Saturday, November 15, 2014

Marie Joins Our Family

On the evening of August 4th, my friend, Amy, who lives near Idaho Falls called me and said she had free tickets to a baseball game. So, Emily, Scott and I went. It was fun! Scott was getting into it (it was his second or third game since we got there), but then it started to rain so we decided to go. At around the time we were thinking about leaving I had my first real contraction. I had a lot of Braxton-Hicks contractions during my pregnancy, but this was the first real one. That was at about 9:30pm. I didn't think it was the beginning of anything, but I was very sure it was a real contraction. I got home, got Scott in bed and went to sleep and I was so happy to be in bed. I had another couple of contractions--maybe one per hour for a while. I woke up to use the bathroom a few times, and thinking back I must have gotten up because I had a contraction. Around 1am or so, I was having contractions more often and I sat down in a chair and timed a few. I called the midwife on call and said, "I'm having contractions about every 10 minutes. I really don't want to have this baby tonight. My husband is not coming back from Laos for two more days. Is there any way to STOP this?" She suggested I stay calm, draw myself a warm bath and do my best to relax. So, I did that. I had three contractions in that warm, "relaxing" bath, so I got up, had a contraction, got dressed, had a contraction, ate a bowl of cereal, had a couple of contractions, brushed my teeth, had a contraction, put some stuff in a bag for the hospital, had another contraction, then woke up my sister and told her I had had about 12 contractions in the past hour and I needed to go to the hospital. She was surprised, but supportive.

We drove to and walked into the hospital, stopping once or twice along the way for me to have a contraction. We rang the doorbell (there's no one there at reception at night because it's a super small hospital with no emergency room), they let us in, and got me into my room, into a gown, and then three nurses started firing questions at me. And that's when I said, "Is one of you in charge of getting me an IV? I need to get a bolus of fluid so I can get my epidural ASAP." They laughed at me. And then they got the IV people going. I was really wishing at this point that I hadn't been in denial and just admitted that I was in labor so I could have gotten to the hospital sooner. (To be fair, I had never gone into labor this way. My water broke with Scott and I was induced with Bobby.) Contractions were coming much faster and harder and closer together and it got much, much harder to continue answering the nurse's questions. Finally, the anesthetist arrived and for what seemed like an eternity he stood behind me with a needle in my back. I was shaking like mad, the contractions were not letting up and Emily just hugged me and reminded me to keep breathing. The epidural finally took effect and they gave me anti-nausea medicine immediately afterward at my request and I didn't puke this time!! I'm guessing this happened around 5:30 or 6am. So that was great. Since I was settled and pain-free, Emily drove home (about 2 minutes) to wake up her 12-year-old daughter and tell her what was happening so she could tell my kids when she woke up.

By the time Emily got back, I had been sleeping for about 40 minutes or so and it was time to push! They got me all set up, I pushed 3 or 4 times and out she came at 7:04am! And no stitches this time!! It was extremely unfortunate that Matt could not be there. However, we were able to Skype with him immediately after she was born and so he saw her being weighed and measured (6lbs 12.7oz, 19 inches) and we were able to chat with him. It was okay. We couldn't have predicted that she would come 8 days early. Scott was 5 days late and I was induced on my due date with Bobby (based on how quickly I progressed with him I think I would have been about 2 days late or less even). So, we assumed she would be late, but we still allowed for what we thought was the impossible and had Matt flying in 6 days before my due date on a Thursday. I planned to have him come with me to the doctor and see how things were going and see how soon I could be induced so as not to waste too much of his time off. Well, Marie had a plan of her own!

Here are some of her first pictures:

Marie has been a very good baby so far. She usually sleeps at least a 4-hour stretch and sometimes it's more like 6 hours in a row, which has been enough to keep me sane and even happy. I have wondered why I am enjoying her babyhood so much more than I enjoyed my first two. I think I was worried about doing everything right with Scott (and he was a very difficult nurser at the beginning) and with Bobby, I wanted to give him the same amount of time and everything I gave to Scott which is impossible, and he didn't sleep so I was severely sleep-deprived. I know I feel differently about her because she's a girl and most likely she'll be a mother someday like me, but I think even if I had had another boy, it would have been easier to enjoy my third baby. There was always a little bit of resentment (and sometimes a lot bit) that my children had stolen my freedom. But, Marie can't steal what's already been stolen. So, I don't blame her at all. I've finally accepted it this time around that I'm a mom and I do love it. Someday they won't live with me and I'll have my freedom back, but for now I need to enjoy this phase. I keep wishing I could go back and tell myself to enjoy Scott and Bobby more, but I'll just have to take my own advice going forward about their current stages. Hooray for the third child epiphany! We love you, Marie!!

(Regarding her name, it took forever and I think I went through a list of about 50 names, but the moment Matt came up with Marie Joy and he seemed happy with it, I ran with it. He hadn't felt settled about any other name I suggested, so I was just happy he had made a decision.)

The boys love her. Bobby is especially affectionate, but they both love to give her hugs and to talk with her. They have been playing together really well lately, which has made things all the easier for me to dedicate the necessary time to taking care of her. We are truly a happy family of late.


Chace & Rivka said...

So sweet, Becky! I love birth stories, especially those of my favorite people:) She is a total doll, just like her big brothers, and I LOVE her name. Well done all around! When will the stars align so I can meet all these cute little people you are making?! Love to you guys!

Makenzie Flores said...

What a wonderful birth story!!
And it is insane how things are so similar between us (feelings about having a third child I mean). You took the words right out of my mouth!

Hannah Neville McMillan said...

wow! sounds super fast. I am so glad you are enjoying her so much!!! xoxo

Becky said...

Rivka, I wish the stars could align while you're in Italy!!